100 replies to this topic

[dankingery]

ah, what a fantastic archive of foolish impulse spending. i really enjoyed reading all of our great adventures again. i haven't purchased too much in terms of toys in the past couple of years. but i have a new tale of mystery and wonder that spawned from an ill-fated christmas shopping trip.

first off, i would like to state that i am the victim here. this was entrapment. my favorite toys r us is now the secret headquarters to some evil genius criminal mastermind. someone set up a booby trap and i fell for it. i should probably start from the beginning. the only reason i was in a toys r us this time of year was to look for a gift for my niece. i got some lousy intel from my sister-in-law about a gift idea. apparently it's some toy that you had to buy back in may in order to find one. anyway, after i had done my second circuit of the store in search of this item i noticed a gorgeous t-rex replica. not being one to pass up a good looking dino i sashayed on over to put my hands on it. this is where i sealed my fate. some wicked person, who obviously loves watching people make fool's of themselves, put the mercat family toys right next to the t-rex. RIGHT NEXT TO IT. who in their right mind could pass up the opportunity to eat the mercat families with the t-rex? honestly, who, i ask you? well, while the mercats were being eaten and screaming for their lives, personally i think the t-rex got a little too carried away, the damn shelf they were on broke on one end. every damn thing on that shelf made for the floor. i promise i was trying not to laugh. i tried to fix it and i still have no idea how it happened. the second leading theory is crazy holiday shoppers were beating the hell out of the store. i only say second because i'm still sure there's a super villain laughing at the security footage as they watch it over and over. anyway, as i was fiddling with their deathtrap shelf an aisle zombie walked over and asked me if i would leave the store. she was probably irritated already with nutjob shoppers, and my laughing wasn't helping my case any. the highlight of this stop was that i saw the coolest white war elephant on the bottom shelf there. might have to pick that up someday. the figure riding it is lame beans but there's no law that says i can't put a marvel universe figure on it.

i did pick up, the next day, two more yo-yos when i was at the world's worst toys r us. they also were out of my intended target. so to hell with them.