Jump to content

Theme© by Fisana
 

Photo
* * * * - 3 votes

Battle Beasts- Full Descriptions & Notes


  • Please log in to reply
205 replies to this topic

#201 Jabroniville

Jabroniville

    Serious Collector

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 265 posts

Posted 11 June 2019 - 11:27 PM

104JeererMonk1a.jpg
 
#104: JEERER MONKEY
 
Animal Basis:
 
1280px-Proboscis_monkey_%28Nasalis_larva
 
-The fat nose of this guy indicates that he is a Proboscis Monkey, famous for such a feature. Called "Dutch Monkeys" by the natives of Indonesia (who thought the Dutch colonists had fat bellies and huge noses, just like these guys), they are the largest monkey species endemic to Asia. The famous nose is known mostly to the males (as a sign of virility), who are also twice the size of females. One male rules a group of many females, as is usual for primates, with the rest being all-male groups. Proboscis Monkeys hail from the three nations of Borneo- Indonesia, Brunei & Malaysia, mostly sticking to rivers- making it among the most aquatic of primates.
 
Toy Description: Hahaha, oh GEEZ, this is a monstrosity. One of the two ugliest Laser Beasts, Jeerer Monkey is the cheapest of the "late release" LBs, owing to... well, he's UGLY. Like, LOOK AT THIS! Big, wide head. Dumb expression. Super-phallic bulbous nose. A hand that looks like... whatever the hell that thing is. The weird mustard yellow color scheme. It's almost impossibly bad, especially for a line that usually excelled so much. Even the detailed armor can't save it! Like... he's wearing SHORTS! And what the hell is with his hand? What IS that? 
 
His face is at least a little detailed- a pronounced, long mouth, with a nose that juts out straight forward and is quite rounded and bulbous. There are some wrinkles at the side of his mouth, and the fur on the top of his head appears to have raised portions near the top of his face.
 
Colors: Six. His fur is a dull, mustard yellow, and he has a pink face. His eyes are red, while his armor is dark brown with dark green highlights. And, unusually, he has a SIXTH color- a yellow rim around his Chest Marble! So there IS another guy with six colors in the line!
Armor: Jeerer Monkey has a somewhat detailed set of dark brown armor, sitting in two pieces. The chest sports a trio of small green lights on each side, surrounded by raised edges. His shoulder pads are two-tiered, with very squared-off levels. His codpiece is very boxy, with three vents on each side of a rectangular piece over the crotch. Unusually, he has "shorts"- boxy and sporting vents on the front and raised "rims" going around the bottoms. His feet wear little "anklets" consisting of a single wireframe with little rectangular boxes up front. His right arm has a tiny little wristband, while his "Weird Hand" has a very long wristguard, a joint/notch in the center, and four unusual phalanges sticking out in a splayed-out fashion- these are segmented and come to points. There is also a little green light on the top of his head.
 
Weapon: His gun is a golden, humanesque head with three spikes on the back (resembling his Weird Hand's phalanges), and a gun oddly sticking out of the front of its face. It's very weird.
Hands & Feet: One small mitten hand, and one odd piece of metal that looks like an alien, mechanical "hand", albeit with fingers of equal size. His feet leave all four toes (complete with blunt nails) exposed.
Easily-Broken Bits: Probably the wings. Good like keeping the paint on the tips of his knees, too.
 
Do I Have One?: Nope.
 
Overall Score: 4/10 (very detailed armor, but REALLY ugly and with a "WTF?" inexplicable weird hand)

Edited by Jabroniville, 11 June 2019 - 11:28 PM.

  • 0





#202 ZebraLegion

ZebraLegion

    Budding Collector

  • Members
  • PipPip
  • 30 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Michigan
  • Interests:Battle Beasts & Laser Beasts

Posted 12 June 2019 - 09:51 AM

Agreed.  This dude is hideous.  

 

I actually like his gun.  I don't understand the spikes that match his weird hand, though.

 

4/10 seems generous! I'm going to go back through the thread and see who has the lowest score.  I can't remember anyone lower than 4/10.


  • 0

Searching for any middle 12 or higher 12 lasers- happy with just the figures don't need complete Killer Hound

 

Searching for Greek Fox set: Green, Pink, Purple, Light Blue, Metallic Blue, Silver, Black, Brown

 

Searching for any Zebra's in any condition 


#203 ZebraLegion

ZebraLegion

    Budding Collector

  • Members
  • PipPip
  • 30 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Michigan
  • Interests:Battle Beasts & Laser Beasts

Posted 12 June 2019 - 10:11 AM

Here's the list so far of your favorite and least favorite just because:

 

Lowest Rating

3/10 Danger Dog (Agree he's pretty boring and I love dogs)

3/10 Tarsier Tyrant (Disagree.  I love this weirdo.  I'd give him like 8.5/10)

3.5/10 Ground Wolf (Agree.  A wolf could be great and this was a letdown)

4/10 Jeerer Monkey (Agree.  I might give him a 2.5/10)

4/10 Ossified Orangutan (Disagree.  Loved him as a kid.  Reminded me of the gorilla that used a special glove (?) in the movie Congo. 9/10)

4/10 Bludgeonly Bulldog (Disagree.  Not spectacular but solid.  7.5/10)

4/10 Grizzly Bear (Disagree.  He is a pretty boring sculpt but he was part of my small army that my brothers gave me so I loved him. 7/10)

 

Highest Rating

10/10 Zariganian (Agree.  He's pretty cool. 9/10)

10/10 Bloodthirsty Bison (Disagree.  Never had him as a kid and he just doesn't do it for me. 5/10)

10/10 War Weasel (Agree.  Legend.)

10/10 Slasher Seahorse (Agree.  I wouldn't give him a 10 but he's great 9/10)

10/10 Black Panther (Agree.  He's amazing.)

10/10 Cutthroat Cuttlefish (Disagree.  Never liked him or the Octopus at all 4/10)

 

I can update this once you finish all 112! Are you going to do the Clear Carp, Gator, and Stone Cobra?  Any of the customs?

 

What will we do when this is overrrrrrrrr?  :(


  • 0

Searching for any middle 12 or higher 12 lasers- happy with just the figures don't need complete Killer Hound

 

Searching for Greek Fox set: Green, Pink, Purple, Light Blue, Metallic Blue, Silver, Black, Brown

 

Searching for any Zebra's in any condition 


#204 Jabroniville

Jabroniville

    Serious Collector

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 265 posts

Posted 13 June 2019 - 02:57 AM

Here's the list so far of your favorite and least favorite just because:

 

Lowest Rating

3/10 Danger Dog (Agree he's pretty boring and I love dogs)

3/10 Tarsier Tyrant (Disagree.  I love this weirdo.  I'd give him like 8.5/10)

3.5/10 Ground Wolf (Agree.  A wolf could be great and this was a letdown)

4/10 Jeerer Monkey (Agree.  I might give him a 2.5/10)

4/10 Ossified Orangutan (Disagree.  Loved him as a kid.  Reminded me of the gorilla that used a special glove (?) in the movie Congo. 9/10)

4/10 Bludgeonly Bulldog (Disagree.  Not spectacular but solid.  7.5/10)

4/10 Grizzly Bear (Disagree.  He is a pretty boring sculpt but he was part of my small army that my brothers gave me so I loved him. 7/10)

 

Highest Rating

10/10 Zariganian (Agree.  He's pretty cool. 9/10)

10/10 Bloodthirsty Bison (Disagree.  Never had him as a kid and he just doesn't do it for me. 5/10)

10/10 War Weasel (Agree.  Legend.)

10/10 Slasher Seahorse (Agree.  I wouldn't give him a 10 but he's great 9/10)

10/10 Black Panther (Agree.  He's amazing.)

10/10 Cutthroat Cuttlefish (Disagree.  Never liked him or the Octopus at all 4/10)

 

I can update this once you finish all 112! Are you going to do the Clear Carp, Gator, and Stone Cobra?  Any of the customs?

 

What will we do when this is overrrrrrrrr?  :(

Hey, neat! Thanks for assessing them :)

I would go lower with Jeerer Monkey, but it's clear the armor and his Weird Hand ARE really detailed. It's all that saved him from like a 2 or a 3. He annoys me by sucking so bad- he's a LATE NUMBER LASER BEAST!!! The guys around him are Dragons and T-Rexes and junk. 

Haha, I'm really tortured by the notion of completing this list, almost, because this forum is SO QUIET, even with my notes. It's been about three topics updated in the past YEAR AND A HALF. Again, I'm upset that I discovered this forum so late- I feel like all the big conversations have already happened. So like... if I finish my notes, will I forget to even visit here for months at a time? There's a FB page or two, but it's mostly Buy & Sell stuff. 

I might make some notes on the clear guys, but they're not really unique figures. Customs might be fun (I have Green Mountain's Ankylosaurus!). But I'm still like 20 names off from being DONE.


  • 0

#205 ZebraLegion

ZebraLegion

    Budding Collector

  • Members
  • PipPip
  • 30 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Michigan
  • Interests:Battle Beasts & Laser Beasts

Posted 13 June 2019 - 06:52 AM

I hear you.

 

We were a little late to the game when this board was popping.

 

Plus if we could've gotten interested in BB years earlier think of all the money we could've saved! 

 

Prices seem to have jumped since the beginning of the year.  There is one lunatic selling complete series 1 beasts for $40.  Recently he added beasts with broken weapons for $40.  Nobody will buy them. But some beasts without weapons are selling for $15 for common ones.  

 

I look forward to the next installment!  Let's cherish the last few and hope something new gets people excited again on here.


  • 0

Searching for any middle 12 or higher 12 lasers- happy with just the figures don't need complete Killer Hound

 

Searching for Greek Fox set: Green, Pink, Purple, Light Blue, Metallic Blue, Silver, Black, Brown

 

Searching for any Zebra's in any condition 


#206 Jabroniville

Jabroniville

    Serious Collector

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 265 posts

Posted Yesterday, 12:43 AM

 
106MonkeyFight1a.jpg
 
#106: MONKEY-FIGHTER
 
Animal Basis: 

capuchin-monkey_1-S.jpg
 
-It's... hard to tell. He's probably a monkey, given the name, but his features are so generic that he could be ANY species. A flat face, short muzzle, pointed canines, big ears... lots of stuff looks like that. Could be a Capuchin or a Howler Monkey or whatever.

The Capuchin is a pretty famous iconic monkey, used as an Organ Grinder sidekick in stereotypes of old, trashy New York for a long time. Y The Last Man, a pretty good comic (though the ending sucks the life out of you like nothing else), uses one as Yorick's eternal sidekick and "pretty sh*tty pet", though in real life, they're very intelligent, and are able to help paraplegics and others in need. They live pretty much like lions, with a male ruling a large group of females with whom he mates, but rival males are a constant threat, and like most mammals, they will kill the infants of the predecessor to ensure the females reach estrus quicker.

 

Toy Description: What in the name of GOD is THIS atrocity supposed to be?!? Monkey-Fighter has unquestionably the WORST face in the entire Beast line- the equivalent of that cartoon face the lady sketched on Jesus in that painting. This is like something designed by somebody who has no idea how art works, but somehow got a job at Hasbro in the 1980s. It doesn't help that even the image on the STA toy site is HORRIBLY painted, with splotches all over the sides of the face.
 
Monkey-Fighter has long arms, mitten-like hands, a weird scale-pattern all over his body... which I guess is actually the undershirt of a NINJA, given his headband also indicates ninja-stuff. And the ugliest face in Beasts history.I... I can't imagine what they were thinking when they came up with him. "Um... what's with his face?" "Umm... we needed 112, okay?"
 
Overall, yeah, I guess he's supposed to be a ninja. I didn't quite notice it until I REALLY looked at what all his bits were. They typically have those headband symbol things- called "headband protectors" and being common in anime and video games (Naruto in particular uses them to hold symbols for the various Ninja clans). The "mail" armor over his body seems to indicate protection, and his armor is actually padding.
 
Colors: Five. His "skin" is dark grey, and he has a blotchy, pale, pink-ish face. His eyes are red, and his armor is dark green. His secondary color (Marble Ring, four armor bits, his headband) are all a dull, mustard yellow.
Armor: Monkey Fighter has a very simple set of armor, resembling that of a ninja, with padding instead of real ARMORY bits, y'know? His chest apepars to have a vest (with an open chest). His shoulder pads are very light and don't stick out much, and he has two smaller pads on the sides of his arms, along with small wristbands. I can't make out much of his codpiece (it has two short lines etched into the front), and his "shorts" are basically long green pants with round kneepads (with diamond shapes etched into the tips), and a "rim" around the bottoms. He also has anklets and a head covering, which has a yellow headband wrapped around the front, with a large forehead protector. The symbol looks... like an "R", and I'm not going to go through an entire list of Japanese kanji just to find that, lol. His chest straps have four little yellow bits that are probably supposed to be shuriken.
 
Weapon: His gun is a golden,... non head-like thing. The gun tip is short, and sticks out of what kind of looks like a helmet with side-vents. 
Hands & Feet: Two mitten hands. His feet are exposxed, showing four long toes each.
Easily-Broken Bits: None, though he appears to be HORRIBLY painted.
 
Do I Have One?: Nope. You'd have to pay ME to have one.
 
Overall Score: 2/10 (good heavens, he's just hideous. Talk about a failure of design)

  • 0






Copyright © 2019 LittleRubberGuys.com