6 replies to this topic

[Ridureyu]

Ah, Spikor. One of the last villains to be introduced into the He-Man cartoon, yet a pretty well-remembered toy. I just got one recently, after a little bit of searching (for a pretty low price, too). Now, it's a pretty well-known fact that Eternia's citizens are... well... less than normal, but Spikor seems to be one of those "fringe" mutant freaks. Two-Bad and Mekanek comes near his level of weirdness, but for different reasons: Two-Bad punches himself, and Mekanek is a phallic symbol.

At first glace, it may seem useful- Spikor is covered with spikes, and thus, He-Man can't touch him without getting hurt. However, if you look closely you'll notice that his spikes are very *dull,* and his trident weapon actually has rounded points! Evidently, Spikor's spikes are not for stabbing. What purpose, then, do they serve?

It's simple. Spikor is Snake Mountain's massage ball. Just look at him! He's big, round, and covered in spike-shaped lumps. Since the cartoons proved that Spikor makes even Trap-Jaw seem intelligent, therefore his true use can't be for fighting.. it's therapy! Al that an evil warrior has to do is grab spikor and rub the guy's body against his/her back, immediately easing tension! Of course, this might cause a few problems among the bad guys:

Evil-Lyn: "Beast-man! You've had Spikor for the last hour and a half! It's my turn now!"

Beast-Man: *growl* *snort* "No, you'll get him when I'm done!"

Evil-Lyn: *Zap*

Beast-Man: "Here! Take him!"

Evil-Lyn: "Ah, much better. I can feel my muscles relaxing already!"

Spikor: "Spikor happy! Spikor give butt massage!"

Evil-Lyn: *Zap*

Spikor: "ow."

[Doctor Dew]

hahaha.

dam, dude.

[DoctorKent]

The really stupid thing is Skeletor hiring him as an Evil Warrior. It's not like He-Man could be cut or anything. What chance did he have? WHAT CHANCE!!!

DoctorKent
http://doctorkent.tr...om/roadblasters

[Ridureyu]

Two words: Butt Massage.

[DoctorKent]

Two words: Butt Massage.

He-Man (putting on loincloth and panicked): Your spikes will never stop me!

Spikor: Oh, admit it, you liked it.

He-Man: by the Power of Grayskull!

(Cuts off Spikors head)

He-Man - now no one will ever know.

(Orko snickers in the bushes)

[Ridureyu]

(Orko snickers in the bushes)

Exactly

[RubzOne]

Dam man, that review made my day. I really needed a good laugh I am going nuts here working on this shizznite