Now, if you do not know of these, they are little action figures with an obvious military theme. Basically, to me they are just munchkin G.I. Joes. Some consider these knock offs of Mattel's Men of Medal, but I think these guys can hold their own. I remember seeing these guys on the toy shelves at a non-local Wal-Mart back in the day. I was around twelve years old or so, at the time. I hated this ear, since my elders were crshin' my buzz on toys and action figures...I was supposed to be the proverbial "big boy" now, eh? BAH! Never got any of the Military Muscle Men as a lad, but always thought they were Hella neat! Weird little dwarf Joes...neat bad guys...just cool. No show, no comic, no movie. Heck, I don't even remember any commercials! One of those cool, but obscure toy lines.
These guys came mainly in three-packs. You got three themed figures, a set of accessories attached to a plastic tree (like with car models), and a "bonus" medal. Not much of a true bonus if every pack gets one by default...but whatevs...there were also apparently special six-packs, too. I recently got up a jonesin' for Military Muscle Men after half-hearted attempts to both acquire general info on them and put 'em into my collection of action figures. I know not if these are heavily sought after or worth any big bucks, but I did come across an eBay seller with sixteen of the eighteen figure sets and I took the bait. I only had competition on one of the packs, and lost. So, I got fifteen mint sets...not too shabby. Almost an instant collection! Here they blow:
There are the Mighty Heroes and the Mighty Enemies. The card art on the Heroes packs are all the exact same, except for the team name and the background diamond shape behind the blister bubble. I noticed the background deco is "off" on a lot of the packs...there's a sky backround, a dirt one, jungle, desert...but most don't match up with their corresponding team. Just though that was an oddity on an otherwise nicely designed package. Artwork is pretty cool...moderately stylized. The Enemies have their own special cards. The artwork is the same, but the colors are altered. It looks like little blades or spikes were added to the vehicle cockpits to make 'em more evil-looking, but I doubt the actual toys have those spikes. The soldier guy in the left is replaced by an evil fella on the Enemy card...looks like some knock off Zartan, to me! You also see a red warning bar across the bottom warning you that these are in fact dangerous characters capable if overall badness. Be warned!
On both Hero and Enemy cards is the red starburst advertising the bonus medal. The Heroes are all the same, but the enemies all have different text! They really went all out on the bad guys, huh? I like that. On the corner of the actual blister bubble is another red starburst...a sticker with the characters names. I believe you have to refer to the cardback, since they appear to be more "in order"...I guess...up for debate.
The backs of the cards are the same, except for the vehicles. The Enemies cardback has the enemy vehicles, obviously...straight repaints of the Hero ones. I do not own any...YET! The playsets don't do much for me...there;s one for land, sea, and air. The sea one at least can double as a bigger vehicle. I probably won't worry about those...eh.
There are twenty body sculpts...each mold gets reused at least twice. There are no mixed or matched limbs, though. They just recolored each figure, straight up. The weapons come in green, black, and silver. No certain weapons got with certain figures...a free-for-all!
Each figure is about two inches tall...made of hard plastic. Each little man has five joints, all rotating. The shoulders, hips, and necks are all articulated. They tend to be a tad sticky or stiff. I'm not sure if it's just because that these were cooped up for over fifteen years or if it's just an issue of quality in general.
Each figure has a port in the back to plug in accessories. Just like mini G.I. Joes, see? The weapons all have a big plug on the back...except for the binoculars...they are teensie weensie widdle tidbit thingie-jiggers which I guarantee will be lost, eaten or inhaled if not handled carefully. GUARANTEE!!! Most of the guns 'n' such have an extra "handle" molded onto them, near or on the existing gun handles, since the figures hands are so small. Easier grabbin'.
Now, the medals...oh, those precious medals! Sadly, I had hoped they'd be made of some cheap, yet "real" metal, but no...vacuumized metal plastic. Each has a black plastic clip on the cloth ribbon to attach to one's clothing. I'm not sure if these are even real medals or awards. They might be based off of real ones, maybe. Any military experts in the house?! Heh, not sure if the ribbon colors mean anything either or is they have any kind of accuracy to real-world awards. You'll notice some don't even appear on the cardbacks! I got a few that didn't show up on the pack back.
My fave? Scope it:
Yesssss! Unlimited POWERRRR!!!! Count Zackula: Terror Troop Commander...I like the sound of that. Moo hoo hoo ha ha ha hah!!! Poisoner of water supplies, smasher of cell phone towers, and spiker of drinks.
Aside from being cool all on their own, I love 'em because they make cool, alternate Battle Beast foes. One of the main reasons I ended up being smitten with Military Muscle Men! Behold my small battle gallery:
Although I still need three sets, and maybe some of the vehicles, here are some shots of the teams...loose...for you pleasure. Enjoy!
Edited by countzackula, 11 February 2012 - 10:48 AM.
